Solitude

I am alone but not alone
my eyes see no one
my ears, aware only
of birdsong
through my open window
yet voices speak within, their words
a jumble of sound

I am alone but not alone
as people walk by
absorbed in activity
their faces animated
talking, alive
mothers, daughters, fathers, sons
longing for belonging

I am alone but not alone
family, friends, acquaintances
they say they care
they say they’re there
compassion and empathy
willingly given, yet
lacking understanding

I am alone but not alone
in social situations, my body
there, yet my mind
emotionally distant
engagement minimal
awkward conversation
stilted, I fall quiet

I am alone but not alone
remain inside my walls
a physical barrier
like the walls
in my mind
keeping me safe, keeping you out
only my thoughts for company

copyright © 2018 Karen Horsley