Just supposing you had cancer and chemotherapy was advised. So you have chemo and it affects your eyesight which means you are unable to continue in the job you love, the job that is your reason for living.
Do you feel lucky to be alive, grateful for the treatment that saved your life but also destroyed it?
How can you move on from this?
An overheard conversation prompted this post. My immediate thought was “but you’re still alive, surely being alive outweighs anything else?” But then I remembered how infertility destroyed everything that I wanted and how cancer destroyed any belief I had in my future. I remembered the pain, the disappointment, the guilt, the hopelessness. I know this is not directly comparable as infertility/cancer were not random side effects from life saving treatment but my sense of loss was in all likelihood similar.
I’m regularly called inspirational because of what I’ve lived through and what I’ve achieved despite (or because of) adversity. But, what choice is there?
Depression is not a choice.
PTSD is not a choice.
The loss of certainty in my own health, the fear of cancer returning, the seemingly unending spiral of hopelessness and despair… not choices.
The world that you thought you knew, the future that you thought you had, gone in an instant. In just one moment your life changes for ever… and you know there’s no way back. You mourn the life you’ve lost and the hopes you had. But the only real option is to move forward.
Take what you can from the experience. Take your mental strength. Your knowledge. Your determination. And make a new world for yourself. A new future with new hopes and new dreams.
Looking back can be hard, but looking forward can be harder still. Stepping into your uncertain future with any amount of faith will be difficult, but you can do it.
The future is uncertain for everyone. What matters most is how you approach it.
Be awesome. Be inspirational. Be you.
Love, K x