Where Are You?

There’s this feeling that’s been whirling around my head for a few months now, and that feeling is disappointment.  Not disappointment in myself or my life, although it’s not exactly a bed of roses right now.  But disappointment in other people and their lack of being there.

First up I’ll say that the people reading this can be assured that they won’t be the ones I’m disappointed in.  I’m talking about long standing friends who have just disappeared from my life.  People who were there for me during cancer but weren’t when it came to supporting me afterwards.  People who lack empathy and sympathy.  People who can’t congratulate me on how far I’ve come over the past 4 years.  People who have not once said ‘wow published poet, awesome stuff mate!’  People who turn any conversation back to themselves and how they have a worse illness, family or life.

People who can’t take the time to send a text asking how I’m doing.

The theme for today’s poem is disappointment.


Where Are You?

My heart is built from bricks of kindness
In caring words and tender touch I know you’re there

For now

When life comes crashing down
Emotion overwhelms rational thought
As dark tendrils grasp and pull me under
Into a suffocating miasma of hopelessness

Alone with the demons that destroy me
A lonely rider on the carousel of fear

When, in the void of silence, my heart weakens

Where are you?

copyright © 2018 Karen Horsley